Dear UU Parents and Guardians,
It would be lovely if you could join us for our weekly gatherings! Here is what is currently being offered: *Sunday School * Approximately: 30 minute program geared towards K-5 but open to all ages Sundays at 11am Email me for the link Lesson with the amazing Morissa Raymond this Sunday! This summer you will find: Drag Queen Story Hour, Yoga with Maggie, and the Pioneers Park Nature Center as well as guests from our very own UU volunteer pool of caring adults. Each week is something different! *Middle and HS Zoom * We are now combining with Omaha youth groups and this will be offered *Wednesday* nights 7-8:30pm Come meet some other cool UUs! Email me for the link *Parent and Guardian Chat: * The chance for parents and guardians to just get together and Every other Thursday 8pm and every other Wednesday noon Thursday July 9th at 8pm Link: https://zoom.us/j/866583131 Password: lovemykids Wednesday July 15th at noon Link: https://zoom.us/j/474526337 Password: lovemykids *New Youtube links for this week!* Music with Miss Molly: https://youtu.be/RxEVqtzh-5I Story with Miss Heather: https://youtu.be/qwyzjXblnQY Chelsea's Meditation Video: https://youtu.be/iLqmymH0SHk Theme this week: Staying Calm Amidst Stress Reflection: Last week my tire kept losing air. I took my car into a tire shop for them to put a patch on and remove a nail. I drove home assuming everything was fixed. The next morning, I had to take the cat to the vet. My daughter loves seeing the cats at the vet's office, so I let her go into daycare later than usual and come with me. Cat, baby, and 3 year-old in tow, I drove down the street towards the vet's office. A mile down the road my tire went flat. The patch hadn't worked. I sprained my ankle a few weeks back and it was still healing. In the chaos, I had failed to remember to put my ankle brace on. In the joy of summer, I had worn a short summer dress. I now found myself on the side of the road (thankfully) using my air compressor, totally in pain, revealing my back side to the cars passing by, and listening to a hot, crying, baby and cat and whining 3 year-old in the car. I then cautiously drove to the tire shop for them to do the repair. I brought my whole circus inside. No one was too happy to be there. The cat and baby continued to cry. The 3 year-old tore through every magazine, touched every surface, and talked to everyone who walked through the door. What helped me get through that day? Breathing and gratitude. It sounds cliche, but I think I might have lost my mind had I not remembered to take a whole lot of deep breaths through the process, and remind myself 'it could be worse'. I also had to laugh at myself and the situation. I took a photo to remember the moment and add to my baby's digital baby book. This is what parenting looks like sometimes. Yet, thankfully, my car was still driveable. I had a carrier for my cat that kept him safe. I had remembered the baby carrier and had both hands free. I had remembered my credit card. The 3 year-old had used the toilet before we left. I had remembered to charge the air compressor a few weeks back. There was a lot to be grateful for, even in a stressful situation. If we take a step back, and breathe, we can often find these moments as 'they are what they are' and move forward even possibly with joy. Words from Sumi Loundon Kim "As parents, we often misattribute our child's behavior as the cause of our stress. But we know that on our 'good' days we are not so bothered if they make messes or get their clothes dirty. On our 'bad' days, though, we get terribly irritated and start chastising our children, saying 'How many times have I told you to eat with your chin over your plate! Now you've stained your shirt and it's going to be impossible to get the stain out." But it's not our children who are the real source of our stress: it's our relationship to what's happening. How can we work with this? The most immediate way is to ask ourselves when we feel stressed out, "Can I relate to this in a different way?" Discussion Questions 1. What's your image of inner peace? Do you think that's realistic 2. Think of one routine activity that you will practice mindfully this week. What will you choose? 3. Does any specific hindrance-sleepiness, restlessness, desire, aversion, or doubt - come up in family life for you? How do you work with that? Is there one hindrance that predominates in your own children's behavior? 4. Have there been any stressful moments in your family recently? Thinking back on a particular moment, can you observe any distinction between what was happening, in and of itself, and your reaction to it? Is there something you would have done differently? 5. How about that stressful moment from the perspective of how you are relating to it? Would a different interpretation or relationship to what was happening have changed your experience of it? Another article suggestion: Parenting during a pandemic is not easy. 'Parenting With Heartbreak' https://www.uua.org/re/blog/parenting-heartbreak?fbclid=IwAR3jtvvM0LuTqRYpXKchTepwseoWNWfsehElPnkhOfJniA0Nt_z7qgk24Fw
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Dear UU Parents and Guardians,
It would be lovely if you could join us for our weekly gatherings! Here is what is currently being offered: *Sunday School * Approximately: 30 minute program geared towards K-5 but open to all ages Sundays at 11am Please email me for the link Drag Queen Story Hour This Sunday!!! This summer you will find: Drag Queen Story Hour, Yoga with Maggie, and the Pioneers Park Nature Center as well as guests from our very own UU volunteer pool of caring adults. Each week is something different! *Middle and HS Zoom * We are now combining with Omaha youth groups and this will be offered *Wednesday* nights 7-8:30pm Come meet some other cool UUs! Please email me for the link *Parent and Guardian Chat: * The chance for parents and guardians to just get together and Every other Thursday 8pm and every other Wednesday noon Wednesday July 1st at noon Link: https://zoom.us/j/474526337 Password: lovemykids Thursday July 9th at 8pm Link: https://zoom.us/j/866583131 Password: lovemykids *New Youtube links for this week!* Music with Miss Molly: https://youtu.be/J6_PEwX11ow Story with Miss Heather: https://youtu.be/RABKsJF2Vpg Story with Ms Alexa: https://youtu.be/HutxYxvpqC8 This week I am focusing my time and attention on my professional development at our annual General Assembly conference. One incredible article which was a point for discussion during Professional Days for Directors of Liberal Religious Education was this, and I highly encourage you to take a moment to read it. 'Dreaming Accountablility' https://leavingevidence.wordpress.com/2019/05/05/dreaming-accountability-dreaming-a-returning-to-ourselves-and-each-other/ I will be back with a video and weekly message next week. Dear UU Parents and Guardians,
It would be lovely if you could join us for our weekly gatherings! Here is what is currently being offered: THIS SATURDAY NIGHT! UU movie night! 'UP', a Pixar film, for youngsters and oldsters and in-betweensters! ZOOM showing starting at 7:00 p.m. on Saturday, June 20. Please share this with others. https://www.facebook.com/events/2673381302940376/ *Sunday School * Approximately: 30 minute program geared towards K-5 but open to all ages Sundays at 11am Please Email Me for the Link Shelly is leading this Sunday the 21st and asks that you bring a toilet paper roll to do the activity! This summer you will find: Drag Queen Story Hour, Yoga with Maggie, and the Pioneers Park Nature Center as well as guests from our very own UU volunteer pool of caring adults. Each week is something different! *Middle and HS Zoom * *CHANGE!* We are now combining with Omaha youth groups and this will be offered *Wednesday* nights 7-8:30pm Come meet some other cool UUs! Please Email Me for the Link *Parent and Guardian Chat: * The chance for parents and guardians to just get together and Every other Thursday 8pm and every other Wednesday noon Thursday the 25th at 8pm Link: https://zoom.us/j/866583131 Password: lovemykids Wednesday July 1st at noon Link: https://zoom.us/j/474526337 Password: lovemykids *New Youtube links for this week!* Music with Miss Molly: https://youtu.be/rLVmAEp1JI4 Story with Miss Heather: https://youtu.be/JpuZPtoKo-4 *Chelsea's Meditation*: https://youtu.be/yTkUkn3DhJ0 The meditation lessons which I am doing are geared towards K-5th graders, but everyone is welcome to them. The theme for my lesson this week was: Not stealing, and gratitude I read the book: Zen Shorts: 'Uncle Ry and the Moon' Reflection: When I was about 14 years old, I was on a trip to a church conference with a few of my friends and my mom. I had been on a weird kick of stealing those little table signs from restaurants. You know - the ones that say: "Pancakes - All You Can Eat Mondays 6-7pm!" I went through a few weird phases. I kept them on my dresser. There was really no reason for stealing these and collecting them besides I thought it was funny. We had stopped at a Cracker Barrel. They didn't have one of the table signs, but they did have a small ceramic dish full of sugar. I put it in my purse. When we got to the van and were cruising along the highway again, I showed my friends. My mom overheard. "Okay - the next Cracker Barrel we find you are going to take that back and apologize!" I couldn't understand. "They probably cost 25 cents! No one will miss it!" However, my mom wanted to make the point that it really didn't matter the worth or value of something, it was that stealing is not right. We stopped at the next Cracker Barrel. I apologized. The host looked at me like I was crazy, "These probably cost like 25 cents", she said. However, I understood what my mom was trying to teach me. To this day, I will remember this story whenever seeing any of those little signs or sugar dishes at restaurants. I'm grateful for a mother, however much embarassing, who taught me the value of having morals. Thoughts from Sumi Loundon Kim: Living together brings up fundamental questions about what is ours and what is shared, not only in terms of possessions, but also in terms of space and time. Of course, we parents are constantly reinforcing lessons around sharing with our children. For example, some families ask the birthday child to give a present to their siblings on that special day, even as they receive many presents themselves. Others may ask the kids to cut a dessert in half themselves and then give the larger piece to their sibling (This results in hairsplitting, precise techniques for cutting said dessert!) We also look at our own behaviors around sharing and negotiating time and space as we model such behaviors for our children. We can also provide leadership in our family by regularly expressing gratitude for what we have in our lives, including our own family members. Verbalizing what we are grateful for helps the children appreciate all that they have. Expressing gratitude for simple things like access to clean water, food, and the local public library helps children become attuned to the abundance in their lives. In time, this will reduce the feeling of insufficiency that is constantly marketed to us through advertising....It is important however not to amplify any feelings of pity or superiority that might come from noticing the abundance in our lives in relation to others. Instead, reinforce the messages that with all that we have we are in a strong position to help others, and that real happiness doesn't come from what we own, but from what we share. *Discussion Questions for the Week*: 1. Have you ever taken something that wasn't yours? How did you feel about it then? And now? 2. How does the culture around you promote overconsumption? Do you think consuming more than is needed is a form of stealing or not? 3. What states of mind lead to the act of stealing? 4. What are you grateful for in your life? 5. When you touch that gratitude, do you find you want more or do you feel satisfied with what you have? 6. What practices of sharing and ownling do you have in your family? How do you negotiate ownership? Dear UU Parents and Guardians,
It would be lovely if you could join us for our weekly gatherings! Here is what is currently being offered: *Sunday School * Approximately: 30 minute program geared towards K-5 but open to all ages Sundays at 11am Email me for the link This summer you will find: Drag Queen Story Hour, Yoga with Maggie, and the Pioneers Park Nature Center as well as guests from our very own UU volunteer pool of caring adults. Each week is something different! *Middle and HS Zoom * *CHANGE!* We are now combining with Omaha youth groups and this will be offered *Wednesday* nights 7-8:30pm Come meet some other cool UUs! Email me for the link *Parent and Guardian Chat: * The chance for parents and guardians to just get together and Every other Thursday 8pm and every other Wednesday noon Thursday the 25th at 8pm Link: https://zoom.us/j/866583131 Password: lovemykids Wednesday July 1st at noon Link: https://zoom.us/j/474526337 Password: lovemykids *New Youtube links for this week!* Music with Miss Molly: https://youtu.be/cp-H0-v82xA Story with Ms Alexa: https://youtu.be/zmyEh7F2-tA Story with Miss Heather: https://youtu.be/B53ruZMLQIE *Weekly Message for Parents and Guardians* Theme this week: Kindness and Compassion *Chelsea's Meditation*: https://youtu.be/_7ASrALiofw The meditation lessons which I am doing are geared towards K-5th graders, but everyone is welcome to them. The theme for my lesson this week was: Kindness and Compassion I read the books: "The Mouse and the Buddha" Metta Chant: May I be free from enmity and danger May I be free from mental suffering May I be free from physical suffering May I take care of my own happiness May my parents, teacher, family, and friends be free from enmity and danger be free from mental suffering be free from physical suffering may they take care of their own happiness May all beings be free from enmity and dangers, be free from mental suffering, be free from physical suffering may they take care of their own happiness May all beings be free from suffering May whatever they have gained not be lost All beings are owners of their own karma As far as the highest plane of existence to as far down as the lowest plane in the entire universe May all beings be free of mental suffering and enmity and from physical suffering and danger. Thoughts from Sumi Loundon Kim: Stealth metta. One way to develop a habit of goodwill is to continue to send metta in the company of others. While traveling on a bus, plane, or train, you can silently send metta to individuals around you. During a meeting, you can send metta to your colleagues. while waiting to pick up a child from school, you can send metta to the children spilling out of the school and the parents picking them up. There's no need to look different or do anything different, and certainly you want to keep your wits about you and stay safe. Wherever you are, send metta to everyone you see. Don't be surprised if people are more open and friendly as a result! *Discussion Questions for the Week*: 1. Who in your life is an incredibly dear friend? How do you show them you care about them? 2. When we practice Metta meditation, we send love to: ourselves, our friends, someone we have neutral feelings about, and someone we have negative feelings about. Is there anyone in your life that is a 'neutral person'? Why are they in that place and not another? 3. What might it be like to extend loving-kindness to family members with whom you have a generally good relationship? How about those with whom you disagree often? Dear UU Parents and Guardians,
It would be lovely if you could join us for our weekly gatherings! Here is what is currently being offered: Sunday School Approximately: 30 minute program geared towards K-5 but open to all ages Sundays at 11am Email me for the link This summer you will find: Drag Queen Story Hour, Yoga with Maggie, and the Pioneers Park Nature Center as well as guests from our very own UU volunteer pool of caring adults. Each week is something different! Middle and HS Zoom CHANGE! We are now combining with Omaha youth groups and this will be offered Wednesday nights 7-8:30pm Come meet some other cool UUs! Email me for the link Parent and Guardian Chat: The chance for parents and guardians to just get together and Every other Thursday 8pm and every other Wednesday noon Thursday the11th at 8pm Link: https://zoom.us/j/866583131 Password: lovemykids Wednesday the 17th at noon Link: https://zoom.us/j/474526337 Password: lovemykids New Youtube links for this week! Music with Miss Molly: https://youtu.be/erqenm8vUWI Story with Ms Alexa: https://youtu.be/S-ZAZNWaVv4 Story with Miss Heather: https://youtu.be/DGwuAmLSGFg Weekly Message for Parents and Guardians Theme this week: "Kindness for a Cause" (also - 'Let's Talk About Race') Chelsea's Meditation: https://youtu.be/bH-aXLBEf6A The meditation lessons which I am doing are geared towards K-5th graders, but everyone is welcome to them. The theme for my lesson this week was: "Kindness for a Cause" I read the books: "Let's Talk about Race" and "Say Something" Reflection: These past couple weeks have been ROUGH. Difficult emotionally for me as a human, but also as a mom. Explaining racism to my 5 and 3yr-olds is no easy task, but it is important. I don't know about you, but I have been having a hard time finding the right words to say. My mind is reeling with my own heartache, and sadness, and anger. I also have to figure out language and resources for how to talk to my own children. This. Is. Not. Easy. I loaded up all three of my children in the van and told them that we were going to drive by the protest. We were going to honk our horn in solidarity because, "In our family we believe that each person deserves kindness - no matter what you look like". We drove by several times. The children waved. I cried. I smiled. We got ice cream afterwards. So now, as a Director of Religious Education Director, I need to think through how I might talk with YOUR children about what is going on with regards to the murder of George Floyd and the Black Lives Matter movement and solidarity and protesting and riots and and and.... As far as I have been keeping track, the group who primarily has been watching the YouTube videos and participating on Sundays seems to steer pretty young - ages kindergarten through 2nd grade. So, I decided to create a video which would help set the foundation for conversations within your own family. If you would like a heads-up about the video which I created this week - read on.... This is the outline: *I mention how children may have noticed adults feelings. How they may have noticed adults talking about protesting or the phrase, "Black Lives Matter". *I read the book, "Let's Talk About Race" which is a recommended reading on the Black Lives Unitarian Universalist (BLUU) website. *I talk about how people who are black have been treated unfairly. How we as Unitarian Universalists have a principle where we say "each person deserves dignity and respect". *I then ask - "What do we do when we see someone not being treated well?" *I read the book, "Say Something" which encourages children to take a stand and use their voice *I conclude with a loving-kindness metta meditation which sends love out to others as well as back to ourselves *I admit during the video at some point how this is hard for me and that I am doing the best that I can. These are hard conversations to have ((ESPECIALLY when it's on pre-recorded video and I don't even entirely know my audience)) I sent an email this last week which included a few resources for talking with children. Here are a few more resources which I have come across: A loving-kindness meditation for ADULTS which was created after the events in Charlottesville, Virginia. A meditation for victims of racism and violence: https://insighttimer.com/susanpiver/guided-meditations/loving-kindness-meditation-for-victims-of-racism-and-violence Sesame Street is hosting a Town Hall tomorrow morning (Saturday) at 9am Central Time: https://www.cnn.com/2020/06/02/us/cnn-sesame-street-standing-up-to-racism/index.html I also came upon a family-friendly virtual online protest hosted through facebook if you would like your children to make signs and go to a rally online with you: https://m.facebook.com/events/2673450936234696?acontext=%7B%22ref%22%3A%223%22%2C%22action_history%22%3A%22null%22%7D&aref=3&ref=m_notif¬if_t=group_activity Words by Sumi Loundon Kim: 'Kindness for a Cause' Service, engagement, and relieving the suffering of others requires considerable energy and effort over the long term. Many activists share that they began their work because they were outraged by injustice, fearful of the consequences of certain policies, or harbored ill will toward those who caused harm. These energies of anger, fear, and hatred are powerful. But while they burn brightly, giving someone the initial momentum to seek change, they are hot and quickly run out. In this way, these energies may lead to burnout. In addition, as the anger or hatred gets expressed, they cause further suffering for both the person using them as well as for others around them. What, then, are some renewable, clean energy sources for long-term activism and engagement? Kindness, generosity, love, joy, friendship, wisdom, and inner peace provide sustainable energy for our work. These energies nourish not only the receiver, but also the giver. And wonderfully, there's no limit to how much of these we can have: while there is such a thing as too much anger, there is no downside to infinite love, kindness, or peace. ((Chelsea's aside: Sumi's words are from a Buddhist perspective - taking meditation into consideration. Sumi's words are not meant to belittle any form of anyone's activism or the warranted anger which recent events have spurred)) Discussion questions to consider this week: 1. What role do you see service playing in your child's spiritual formation? Do you include activism in your family's agenda on a regular basis? Why or why not? What is your family passionate about doing to make the world a better place? 2. How do you talk to your children about difficult topics when you yourself are struggling to comprehend or process? What tools or resources may be helpful to you? 3. When the world seems so overwhelming, or you feel helpless, what do you do? What do you want to teach your children to do when they feel this way? Okay...this is now one of my longest emails to parents ever I think. If you have gotten this far and feel inclined to share your thoughts with me, I'd love to hear from you. Thank you for being a part of my village. Dear UU Parents and Guardians,
It would be lovely if you could join us for our weekly gatherings! Here is what is currently being offered: Sunday School Approximately: 30 Min Program geared towards K-5 but open to all ages Sundays at 11am Email me for the link Middle and HS Zoom Monday nights 6pm: Email me for the link Parent and Guardian Chat: The chance for parents and guardians to just get together and Every other Thursday 8pm and every other Wednesday noon Wednesday the 3rd at noon Link: https://zoom.us/j/474526337 Password: lovemykids Thursday the 11th at 8pm Link: https://zoom.us/j/866583131 Password: lovemykids New Youtube links for this week! Music with Miss Molly: https://youtu.be/_3HShSuc1s0 Weekly Message for Parents and Guardians Theme this week: 'Monkey Brain' Chelsea's Meditation: https://youtu.be/WmvF7AhUBxA The meditation lessons which I am doing are geared towards K-5th graders, but everyone is welcome to them. The theme for my lesson this week was: 'Monkey Brain' I read the book: Mindful Monkey, Happy Panda Reflection: I don't know about you, but I am having the hardest time sleeping. The baby is of course teething, which doesn't help anything. However, my mind is constantly racing. I am having an incredibly difficult time calming my thoughts down. No amount of yoga, or guided meditation is slowing me down right now. This week's video, story, and meditation for children is about how to be present in the moment. But....what if the present moment SUCKS? So much of what is going on in the world right now is hard to cope with hearing about. What do we as parents do, if we are trying to model for our children how to cope as well? I don't have the answer, honestly. 'The best we can' is about all I think I can muster. We show them that we are human, and that it is not always easy to be human. Breathe. Sometimes all we can do is take everything one minute at a time. Words by Sumi Loundon Kim: There's a commercial in which a mother blissfully sails through each room of her home, encountering one scene after the other that would normally cause her to be irritated: a teenage son banging away on drums, a young daughter emptying drawers and making a mess. but why is the mother so blissful? because she is listening to her favorite selection of music through her headphones. The message of the ad is that the way to be content with your family is to tune them out - literally. But if we look carefully at the origins of a lot of family fights, it's most often because people are not paying attention. They're lost in their video game or lost in thought while making dinner. Meanwhile, trouble is brewing: the little sister took her big brother's Lego structure and began taking it apart. Or a spouse keeps asking the other to do something but they aren't listening. Then, someone explodes: "Give it back!" "Do it now!" "Listen to me!" If we want to create peaceful homes, then it's essential for parents to stay tuned in to the atmosphere of the home. As you are cleaning or making a meal, rather than being lost in thought, let your awareness spread out into the far distances of your home. Let your ears be open to the sounds of the environment. Get a sense of the mood of the home, other beings present, and your own place in the home. With greater awareness, we may pick up on the beginnings of bad weather (especially between siblings) before it brews into a storm. The added benefit is that we may truly enjoy and appreciate being at home with our loved ones. Discussion questions to consider this week: 1. What thought patterns or attitudes have you observed when you try to relax? 2. How do you react to your thinking? 3. To what extent would you assess your level of tuning in to your home environment? What gets in the way of tuning in, and what supports it? Dear UU Parents and Guardians,
It would be lovely if you could join us for our weekly gatherings! Here is what is currently being offered: Sunday School THIS WEEK IS DRAG QUEEN STORY HOUR!!!! Approximately: 30 Min Program geared towards K-5 but open to all ages Sundays at 11am Email me for the link Middle and HS Zoom Monday nights 6pm: Email me for the link Parent and Guardian Chat: The chance for parents and guardians to just get together and Every other Thursday 8pm and every other Wednesday noon Thursday the 28th 8pm Link: https://zoom.us/j/866583131 Password: lovemykids Wednesday the 3rd at noon Link: https://zoom.us/j/474526337 Password: lovemykids New Youtube links for this week! Story with Ms Alexa: https://youtu.be/Hgr0q9pYcwk Story with Miss Heather: https://youtu.be/CvgiPEtQHJQ Music with Miss Molly: https://youtu.be/Ga46NrKWrPw Weekly Message for Parents and Guardians Theme this week: Everyday Mindfulness Chelsea's Meditation: https://youtu.be/VmI2KqTQv8g The meditation lessons which I am doing are geared towards K-5th graders, but everyone is welcome to them. The theme for my lesson this week was: Everyday Mindfulness I read the book: 'Each Breath a Smile' I do a meditation with pebbles Reflection: This week, a family member had an emergency appendectomy. My computer crashed after an icky automatic Windows upgrade. I was in the middle of doing my taxes. My taxes kept saving in places prior to where I had already entered information (I think I entered my driver's license number ten times...) My baby spilled a whole container of blueberries all over the kitchen floor. My 3 year-old was digging in the garden and knocked the baby with a shovel upside the head. (He's fine). My 3 year-old may have broken her collar bone AGAIN for the 2nd time this year...there's nothing that can be done, so we aren't even going in for x-rays. My 5 year-old asks for snacks every 20 minutes even when other food is available to him. It was a week that certainly tested my patience. Yet...what could I really do about any of this? I breathed. I breathed again. I took MANY long, deep, bottom-of-the-belly breaths. Over and over and over. Taking a moment to step back and just breathe really does take PRACTICE. Being mindful can sometimes just be in that MOMENT. Yet, we need to remind our brains that instead of getting worked up, breathing, or stepping back for a moment is what we should do. I got through this week, clearly. Here I sit on a lovely rainy day with my cup of tea...and all will be well. When we feel so helpless, breathing really does help. It centers us. It reminds us: I am here. Now. It reminds us of that which we CAN control. So, dear fellow parents, when your child refuses to go to nap, or asks for a that Frozen song for the tenth time today...breathe. This too shall pass. Discussion questions to consider this week: 1. Is there something that happens regularly in your day where you find yourself stressed out and needing to breathe more? Is there something which you can do to adjust that recurring event to make it better? 2. What else in your life has taken practice for you to master? An instrument? A sport? A dance routine? Learning how to play chess? Do you find it challenging to take a step back and breathe? Why is this? 3. What are some simple gifts of ordinary things in your life that you could pause to focus on for a brief meditation? A seashell collected on a vacation to reflect upon your time there? A photo of a loved one? Time spent petting your dog or cat? How about for your children? Words by Sumi Loundon Kim: The meditation has been more actively directed in nature. But it is also possible to practice in an undirected way, simply sitting with open awareness and being mindful of whatever arises and passes away as it is happening. A helpful way to frame this is that rather than 'doing' meditation, one is 'being' meditation (the often repeated phrase is that we are not human DOINGS but human BEINGS). I find this meditation useful when I am restless. I simply stop, breathe, and be. This meditation is helpful for letting go of outcomes generally, and for reducing striving and perfectionism around meditation itself. Dear UU Parents and Guardians
I'd love for you to join us for our weekly offerings: THIS SUNDAY TIME CHANGE: 9am - (usually 11am but changing due to congregational meeting at 11) Sunday School 30 Min Program geared towards K-5 but open to all ages Email me for the link Middle and HS Zoom Monday nights 6pm: Email me for the link Parent and Guardian Chat: The chance for parents and guardians to just get together and Every other Thursday 8pm and every other Wednesday noon TONIGHT Thursday the 14th 8pm Link: https://zoom.us/j/866583131 Password: lovemykids Wednesday the 20th at noon Link: https://zoom.us/j/474526337 Password: lovemykids New Youtube links for this week! Story with Ms Alexa: https://youtu.be/2ln67eEwtnI Story with Miss Heather: https://youtu.be/l5oA5sy_tHA Music with Miss Molly: https://youtu.be/nLLlP6MLWqI Weekly Message for Parents and Guardians Theme this week: The Golden Rule (Treat others the way you would want to be treated) Chelsea's Meditation: https://youtu.be/P9lOl_szv2I The meditation lessons which I am doing are geared towards K-5th graders, but everyone is welcome to them. The theme for my lesson this week was: The Golden Rule I read the book: Do Unto Otters Discussion questions to consider this week: 1. What is your definition of karma? Do you believe in it? 2. Think of some instances when you've observed cause and effect in your own life play out over various lengths of time: immediately, within a few weeks, or over multiple years. 3. What are some aspects of your family's karma that have persisted through the generations? What have you inherited karmically from your family? What do you wish to keep? What do you wish to transform? 4. As you've picked up on a meditative or spiritual path, have you been motivated to escape something from your past? 5. What ethical, psychological, and spiritual inheritance do you wish to bequeath to your children? Some Thoughts from Sumi Loundon Kim Pay careful attention to your intentions just before or as you do or say something. Examine how these intentions shape choices and determine outcomes. In this way, we can begin to gradually uncover how karma works in our lives through the everyday actions we often don't give much thought to. If we look carefully, we can often see the functioning of karma - the principle of cause and effect- in family patterns and across generations. In my own case, this became clear as I got to know different branches of my family and our generational history. Some of our stories and experiences were startlingly parallel. I could trace the impact of trauma in a way-back generation through each successive one and into my own. Alcoholism, personality disorders, frustration at being stuck in a housewife role, war- the suffering rolls right on through. The forward momentum of family karma is powerful. It's well known in the Dharma world that many of the people drawn to the meditation hall, including teachers, come with deep suffering. Of those, many carry trauma from their family of origin. Spiritual seekers therefore can be motivated to undertake a spiritual path to escape or bypass childhood suffering. People have the quiet hope that 'healing' means the pain will go away without having to face it. Spiritual seekers can feel quite enlightened on retreat or on the cushion, but come Thanksgiving or the next family-of-origin gathering, they are right back to old patterns and reactivity. The truth is that no matter how far we run or how long we stay away or how different a lifestyle we choose, we cannot escape our family karma. Even if we go to Asia to live as a cave-dwelling renunciate for decades, there's no running away from dealing with these issues. At some point, if we wish to heal and to give our children and the world a better inheritance, we have to look carefully at our roots and work hard to transform them. Our karmic inheritance doesn't mean that nothing can change. In my family, each generation has worked hard (through therapy and meditation, for instance) to become a little bit more skilled at breaking the cycle of shame and pain. My husband and I, though we surely have our faults from our own painful childhoods, are not bequeathing trauma to our children and are a reasonably healthy set of parents. We are careful not to water the seeds of anger, fear, and resentment and instead plant seeds of love, acceptance, and awareness. We hope these efforts will bear fruit with our children and grandchildren, and on into future generations. Wanting more about Karma? Here is an article from Tiny Buddha, "You Have the Power to Change Someone's Day for the Better" https://tinybuddha.com/blog/you-have-the-power-to-change-someones-day-for-the-better/ Put some good out in the world - it is so necessary right now. Yet, also save some energy for allowing goodness within yourself. Be gentle with yourselves this week. I am grateful for you. -- Dear UU Parents and Guardians
I'd love for you to join us for our weekly offerings: Sunday 11am Sunday School 30 Min Program geared towards K-5 but open to all ages Email me for the link Middle and HS Zoom Monday nights 6pm: Email me for the link Parent and Guardian Chat: The chance for parents and guardians to just get together and Every other Thursday 8pm and every other Wednesday noon Thursday the 14th 8pm Link: https://zoom.us/j/866583131 Password: lovemykids Wednesday the 20th at noon Link: https://zoom.us/j/474526337 Password: lovemykids New Youtube links for this week! Story with Ms Ashleigh:https://youtu.be/E4xFWMvJ5g8 Story with Miss Heather: https://youtu.be/8KCIoyNctU8 Music with Miss Molly: https://youtu.be/v7Yz6O7431Q Weekly Message for Parents and Guardians Theme this week: Generosity Chelsea's Meditation: https://youtu.be/vHlDq517HyQ The meditation lessons which I am doing are geared towards K-5th graders, but everyone is welcome to them. The theme for my lesson this week was: Generosity I read the book: Rainbow Fish Discussion questions to consider this week: 1. What was one of the most memorable gifts, either material or nonmaterial, that you have ever received? What about one that you've given? 2. How did it feel to give this gift? How did it feel to give your gift? 3. Why do you think generosity is one of the foremost teachings and practices in spiritual traditions? 4. Discuss some ways you think you could practice generosity, realistically and meaningfully, in the week ahead. 5. When you are generous with your children, are there strings attached, agendas, or mixed motivations behind your actions? 6. What is the line between generosity and indulgence with our children? 7. How might you cultivate generosity and sharing in your home? Some Thoughts from Sumi Loundon Kim Generosity is not confined to giving things or money. It is possible to be lavish with our gifts but parsimonious with our time and attention. For example, as a new parent, one day I noticed that I was purchasing toys for my kids in the hope that they would be entertained long enough for me to have some time for myself. Ironically, I think what my children really wanted was my attention, and i f I had given that to them fully, they would have been satisfied and gone on to play by themselves. In this way, generosity includes giving our time, our full attention, our love, our inner peace, our skills, and our friendship. These are the gifts that we cherish when someone gives them to us. Generosity also cultivates other significant qualities of spiritual development. It loosens our attachment to time, territory, and money and helps us to see that letting go is not as terrifying as we may have thought. It's an antidote to greed, of course. And acts of giving help us to reevaluate ourselves so that we are defined less by what we own or have and more by the quality of our mind. It's okay if, as you aspire to practice generosity, it's a little bit hard to do. The Tibetan Buddhist teacher Gehlek Rimpoche calls this feeling a 'pinch,' a sign that you're growing beyond your self-limits. A note in reflection of Mother's Day So - in relation to the concept of the word 'generosity', I wanted to recollect a notion that I heard from my own mother at one point. She said something to the effect of, "You know that last bite of chocolate cake? The one that tastes so good and you'd really love to finish? When you offer it to your child instead, that is what it's like being a mom. You always want the best for them. You put them first." Now, I have to selfishly admit that I have been known to refer to my ice cream as 'spicy' so my children don't eat it. I have totally taken that last bite, even though one of them was eyeing it. Yet, the concept remains. I will sacrifice my own sleep to ensure that they feel safe and cared for as I lay beside them and sing at night, even though I could/should be doing dishes, or winding down with some yoga. I will wash their clothes and wear my own sweater two days in a row. I will buy the veggie nuggets in dinosaur shapes instead of the Indian Curry that I'd really prefer. Being a parent is the epitome of generosity. We give...and give...and give when we have nothing left. And it is EXHAUSTING. So, I hope that if you are a parent and this week you are feeling as though you are really needing something to help fill your cup, I hope that you will consider gifting something for yourself. Whether that is the grace of taking a day off of work, five minutes peace in the morning with a cup of coffee before anyone else wakes up, or splurging on those slippers you have always wanted - I hope that you can do something for yourself. Thank yourself for the constant generosity you always offer to others. I don't know about you, but I have had the terrible tendency of holding high expectations on holidays for others to be generous to me. I am finally learning to extend that generosity to myself. I wish you so much love this day and all days. Be gentle with yourselves this week. I am grateful for you. Dear UU Parents and Guardians
I'd love for you to join us for our weekly offerings: ***Note: Some of these links have changed as there are now required passwords for safety*** Sunday 11am Sunday School 30 Min Program geared towards K-5 but open to all ages Email me for the link Middle and HS Zoom Monday nights 6pm: Email me for the link Parent and Guardian Chat: The chance for parents and guardians to just get together and Every other Thursday 8pm and every other Wednesday noon This Wednesday the 6th at noon Link: https://zoom.us/j/474526337 Password: lovemykids Next Thursday the 14th at 8pm Link: https://zoom.us/j/866583131 Password: lovemykids New Youtube links for this week! Story with Ms Alexa: https://youtu.be/3B6G3Bi8Xbs Story with Miss Heather: https://youtu.be/74D4G84pEkQ Music with Miss Molly: https://youtu.be/pKFY6E46-kY Weekly Message for Parents and Guardians Theme this week: Compassion Chelsea's Meditation: https://youtu.be/qMZYQd8Bjiw The meditation lessons which I am doing are geared towards K-5th graders, but everyone is welcome to them. The theme for my lesson this week was: Compassion Mira and the Worm The other night, I was getting my 3 year old daughter, Mira, down for bed. I THOUGHT she was close to falling asleep, but then I heard her start to cry. When I asked what was going on, she told me that she was sad because of the worm. Earlier in the day, she had found a worm, and before we went inside, I had asked her to put the worm back in the dirt so that it could find its home and have food to eat. She admitted to me that she had put the worm on a chair, not back in the dirt. She was so upset because she thought that the worm might not find their home or food. I decided in that moment to go outside with a flashlight, find the worm, and put it back in the dirt. She was much happier. This was a life lesson. Some things can wait, some cannot. Every living thing matters. We can have compassion for even the smallest of creatures, and treat them with dignity. In this moment, I was able to inadvertently teach her about both our first Unitarian Universalist principle (We believe that every person (creature) has worth and dignity) and also our 7th principle (We believe in the interconnection of all life). Phrases you (or children) can use during meditation that address compassion: May you be free from suffering May you be free from pain and sorrow May you be held in compassion May you be at peace Words by Sumi Loundon Kim "Much of our harmful behavior comes from such disconnect, carelessness, and busyness. We wish for others to treat us thoughtfully, yet if we go about our lives carelessly, eventually we will reap what we sow. Therefore, when we act with integrity and take care not to heedlessly dispense with life, we protect our own well-being. Compassion is our heart's ability to resonate with and open to the suffering of others. Compassion also guides us to live in a way that causes the least harm to ourselves and others. When we become sensitive to the pain of others, and we see what kinds of speech and actions create that suffering, then in a very simple way we lose the desire to hurt others, even when it would give us short term pleasure. Compassion is one of the most natural ways to lead us to live by the highest standards of non harming. (During meditation) Depending on the person you're sending compassion to, you may need to adjust the phrasing. For example, if someone's pain cannot be changed, say, "May you be in comfort," or "May you be at ease during this difficult time." Begin with someone who is in clear difficulty and for whom it's easy to connect with(in other words, not your difficult person). Spend some time understanding this situation and cultivating the compassionate heart. Then use the same progression as in metta meditation, returning to yourself, or a benefactor, then a friend, a neutral person, a difficult person, and all beings. If you feel overwhelmed by your own or others' suffering, then shift to practicing compassion for yourself. When you feel settled, return back to the progression . Allow your heart to soften and relax. Toward the end of the meditation, let go of the phrases and sit quietly, noticing how you are at the moment" Questions for you as a parent/guardian this week: 1. In what ways can thoughts themselves be internally harmful? 2. What identifiable ways do you intentionally or unintentionally cause harm? How would you like to change that? 3. How do you talk to your children about not harming others or making amends when harm has been done? This social distancing stuff is HARD. I know many of us are losing patience quickly. It's okay to admit when we are wrong. It's okay to tell our children that we made a mistake, that we'd like a do-over, that we know we can all do better. It's okay to start the day in one way, and end it on a different note. Our children are constantly learning from us. If we admit mistakes, they will also learn that it's okay to admit mistakes. If we apologize, if we make better choices, if we ask forgiveness, they learn all of those positive ways of being as well. Be gentle with yourselves this week. I am grateful for you. |
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AuthorChelsea Krafka is the Director of Religious Growth for the Unitarian Church of Lincoln. Archives
August 2021
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